My year in review
Well, this was a big year for many reasons. It was probably the first year of true discovery of myself as an adult and discovery of many life aspects in all philosophical meanings of the word….
My father lost his long fight with cancer on Thanksgiving of ‘04, and between that time and New Years, I experienced not only the death of my father; but the loss of trust and break-up of my relationship with my boyfriend (and then the getting back together), the loss of a job i loved, and the failing of two classes when I was a 4.0 student. I basically went from ME to a basically unhealthy, unhappy, depressed version of someone else. All i wanted to do was sleep, drink water, cry, and sleep some more. Needless to say I lost a good 15 pounds in a couple of weeks (and, trust me, I didn’t need to be losing any weight).
But when January 1, 2005, rolled in, I told myself I would not let all of that get the best of me. Because a New Year was time for new beginnings.
In the length of 2005, we packed up our house and moved to another (with my brother moving to California), I went back to school full-time and went back to my straight-A streak, I found a job that I loved even more (and which helped me realize what direction I wanted to take school and career-wise), and I came to realize that no matter what personal strife I have- there is always a bigger issue to worry about. I may not want to get out of bed over a broken heart, or I may start crying out of nowhere when I realize how much I miss my father, but life is too precious to waste dwelling on unfortunate things for too long. The only thing anyone can do is keep going and take each experience as a lesson learned, as painful as those experiences may be.
This new year of ‘06, I want to try and keep that frame of mind and hopefully gain more strength to help me make the right decisions and keep myself going. I am back to my happy, normal self and plan on staying that way :)
The main goals are to finish my AA and transfer to a state university, to visit my brother in California, to get along with my mother better (it’s the age of butting heads!) and to stay healthy. There is also another personal goal that I hope to accomplish (or overcome, I guess you could say), which will probably take the most strength mentally and emotionally… It always seems like matters of the heart are the hardest to face…
All I can say is I hope this year is better than the last, and I’m sure it will be ;)
